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Footprints by the Sea
Last night I had a wondrous dream, of prints in beach sand I had
seen. Though my feet hadn't walked that shore, I saw the footprints of my
Lord.
And when a different print appeared, I asked the Lord, "What have
we here? This print is larger, round and neat, and wasn't made by walking
feet."
"My child," He said in somber tone, "For miles I carried you
alone. I challenged you to stand - not ride. To walk and let me be
your guide.
You would not stand. You would not grow. The walk of
faith, you would not know. So then I finally got fed up, and there I
dropped you on your butt.
Because in life, there comes a time, when one must fight and one
must climb, when one must rise and take a stand, or just leave butt prints in
the sand."
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How You Say
It
This page last updated:
03/12/2009 08:26 PM
Hebonics
The NYC School Board has officially
declared Jewish English a second language. Backers of the move say the
district is the first in the nation to recognize Hebonics as the
language of many American Jews. Look for other cities to follow
suit, notably Miami Beach, Los Angeles and Scarsdale. In Hebonics,
questions are always answered with questions:
Question: "How do you feel?"
Hebonics response: "How should I feel?"
The subject is often placed at the end of
a sentence after a pronoun has been used at the beginning: "She dances
beautifully, that girl."
The sarcastic repetition of words by
adding "sh" to the front is used for emphasis: mountains becomes "shmountains";
turtle becomes shmurtle." (mountains-shmountains / turtle-shmurtle)
These common phrases were translated from
"Standard English" to Hebonics:
English: "Sorry, I don't know the time."
Hebonics: "What do I look like, a clock?"
English: "I hope things turn out okay."
Hebonics: "You should BE so lucky!"
English: "I see you're wearing one of the
ties I gave you."
Hebonics: "What's the matter, the other tie you didn't like?
English: "That's a very pretty girl."
Hebonics: "She could stand to gain a few pounds."
English: "May I take your plate, sir?"
Hebonics: "You've hardly touched your food. What's the matter,
something's wrong with it?"
English: "It's been so long since you've
called."
Hebonics: "You didn't wonder if I'm dead yet?"
English: "It's a nice day."
Hebonics: "At least it's not raining."
English: "Happy birthday."
Hebonics: "You should only become a year smarter."
English: "I feel good."
Hebonics: "Things could be a lot worse."
English: "Happy New Year!"
Hebonics: "Another year, G-d willing!"
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